i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Randomize
