WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
