Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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