she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Randomize
