We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
