I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
