On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
