Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
