The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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