I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
