just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
