He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
You need a sexual gate keeper
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
