y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
It's shark week go big or go home
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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