maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize