I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Randomize
