do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
