Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Randomize
