I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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