You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Randomize