Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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