If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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