Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
We're too hungover to prance.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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