Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
