You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
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we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
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we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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