U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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