I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
