id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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