i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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