Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
