At least make sure they are 18
Why
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
