i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize