Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
