I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
