Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize