After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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