So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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