She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Randomize
