You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
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Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
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He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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