Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
