Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
people are starting to question the shark bite story
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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