It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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