Fuck appropriateness.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
