Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.