well you can't waste a boner
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
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