sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
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we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
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Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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