I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
