He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Randomize
