Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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