bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize
