it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
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