Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
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